2nd Miscarriage -- Both Started with Spotting

AliasFan · Joined: 16 Aug 2007 Posts: 3

I just had my second miscarriage in 5 months. My first was at 5-6
weeks post-conception; the second was at 8 weeks. This time it was
very painful and I bled quite a bit. Both miscarriages started with
spotting, then slightly heavier bleeding. My doctor says we can start
testing now or wait until our third miscarriage. Maybe the problem is
hormones, i.e., I'm not producing enough Progesterone, which would be
an easy fix. We'll definitely test for that when I get pregnant next.
The thing is, I conceive every time we try (when I know I'm ovulating),
then I start spotting almost immediately after the implantation period.
Has anyone else had this problem and discovered the source? We're
just praying that it's not a chromosomal problem or a problem with my
uterus. We will wait for those tests until (God forbid) this happens
again. I am still fairly young - almost 28 - but my husband is almost
36 so we want to start having kids as soon as possible. No one ever
talks about the sad part of pregnancy - when it ends and you don't get
to come home with a baby. As much as I am sad for everyone who has
gone through this, I am glad to have a support network out there.
Thanks. Smile

Archived from group: soc>support>pregnancy>loss

Janet Sackman · Joined: 15 Aug 2007 Posts: 120

Hi there and welcome to the ng, I'm so glad that you found us.

How desperately sad to read that you've lost 2 babies in such a short time.
That is just devastating. It happened to me back in 1993 and I'm just so
glad that that is behind me now, it was just awful to live through.

It's great to be able to conceive quickly, I was able to as well and that is
a great blessing, but not if you then go on to lose the baby. Regarding the
progesterone issue, it's hard to say whether that was a cause or a symptom -
maybe progesterone levels are low because your body detected that the baby
wasn't viable, I think it's just very difficult to say. Statistics say that
the majority of miscarriages are caused by one-off chromosome problems but
then when you've just had 2 consecutive losses it's hard to buy into that,
isn't it? (unless that was just me who found it hard!! LOL!!)

How are you dealing with all of this?
--
Love and hugs

Janet
co-moderator, soc.support.pregnancy.loss

"AliasFan" wrote in message @l41g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
>I just had my second miscarriage in 5 months. My first was at 5-6
> weeks post-conception; the second was at 8 weeks. This time it was
> very painful and I bled quite a bit. Both miscarriages started with
> spotting, then slightly heavier bleeding. My doctor says we can start
> testing now or wait until our third miscarriage. Maybe the problem is
> hormones, i.e., I'm not producing enough Progesterone, which would be
> an easy fix. We'll definitely test for that when I get pregnant next.
> The thing is, I conceive every time we try (when I know I'm ovulating),
> then I start spotting almost immediately after the implantation period.
> Has anyone else had this problem and discovered the source? We're
> just praying that it's not a chromosomal problem or a problem with my
> uterus. We will wait for those tests until (God forbid) this happens
> again. I am still fairly young - almost 28 - but my husband is almost
> 36 so we want to start having kids as soon as possible. No one ever
> talks about the sad part of pregnancy - when it ends and you don't get
> to come home with a baby. As much as I am sad for everyone who has
> gone through this, I am glad to have a support network out there.
> Thanks. Smile

>
>

AliasFan · Joined: 16 Aug 2007 Posts: 3

Thanks for your reply. It is wonderful to hear from someone who has
gone through the same thing, although I am very sorry that you went
through it. That is an interesting thought about the progesterone. I
didn't realize that the body produced the hormone in response to the
pregnancy's viability. I think that just in case, however, I'll get my
levels tested next time and take supplements if necessary. Part of me
believes that both of my miscarriages were just nature's way of weeding
out babies that would not have developed properly; however, another
part fears that this will just keep happening every time. I'll find
out I'm pregnant then begin spotting. I'll be like Sisyphus in Hades,
almost reaching the top of the hill only to have the boulder roll down
again. I've prayed that God will strengthen my faith and help me not
think like that because I know those thoughts will only drag me down
and not help the process. I want to be able to control circumstances
with my thoughts: "I am going to have this baby; I won't have a
miscarriage," but of course that doesn't work. To let go and let God
isn't easy, but it's necessary. Thank you for your support, Janet.

Janet Sackman wrote:
> Hi there and welcome to the ng, I'm so glad that you found us.
>
> How desperately sad to read that you've lost 2 babies in such a short
time.
> That is just devastating. It happened to me back in 1993 and I'm just
so
> glad that that is behind me now, it was just awful to live through.
>
> It's great to be able to conceive quickly, I was able to as well and
that is
> a great blessing, but not if you then go on to lose the baby.
Regarding the
> progesterone issue, it's hard to say whether that was a cause or a
symptom -
> maybe progesterone levels are low because your body detected that the
baby
> wasn't viable, I think it's just very difficult to say. Statistics
say that
> the majority of miscarriages are caused by one-off chromosome
problems but
> then when you've just had 2 consecutive losses it's hard to buy into
that,
> isn't it? (unless that was just me who found it hard!! LOL!!)
>
> How are you dealing with all of this?
> --
> Love and hugs
>
> Janet
> co-moderator, soc.support.pregnancy.loss
>
> "AliasFan" wrote in message
> @l41g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
> >I just had my second miscarriage in 5 months. My first was at 5-6
> > weeks post-conception; the second was at 8 weeks. This time it was
> > very painful and I bled quite a bit. Both miscarriages started
with
> > spotting, then slightly heavier bleeding. My doctor says we can
start
> > testing now or wait until our third miscarriage. Maybe the problem
is
> > hormones, i.e., I'm not producing enough Progesterone, which would
be
> > an easy fix. We'll definitely test for that when I get pregnant
next.
> > The thing is, I conceive every time we try (when I know I'm
ovulating),
> > then I start spotting almost immediately after the implantation
period.
> > Has anyone else had this problem and discovered the source? We're
> > just praying that it's not a chromosomal problem or a problem with
my
> > uterus. We will wait for those tests until (God forbid) this
happens
> > again. I am still fairly young - almost 28 - but my husband is
almost
> > 36 so we want to start having kids as soon as possible. No one
ever
> > talks about the sad part of pregnancy - when it ends and you don't
get
> > to come home with a baby. As much as I am sad for everyone who has
> > gone through this, I am glad to have a support network out there.
> > Thanks. Smile

> >
> >

Janet Sackman · Joined: 15 Aug 2007 Posts: 120

Hi there

Thanks for replying (even though I can't actually see my reply on the ng!!
LOL!!) - I'm glad that my reply helped.

I found it so hard to believe that I could actually go on and have a baby
successfully; that confidence just evaporated and really died when my babies
died. My dh wanted me to pull myself together after the first loss and
didn't want to see it as anything other than a one-off event, a blip if you
like, but when it happened for a second time he began to think that there
might just be something really wrong and that we'd never be able to have
another child. I was a bit ahead of him by then, thinking that it was
impossible!!

Perhaps it's a function of how much is riding on our hopes that we daren't
get them up because we're afraid we won't cope when they are crushed. Hmm,
food for thought.

I agree, it is hard to let go of the desire to fret and worry and to
surrender to a higher power. Chances are, that our babies died because there
was something wrong that couldn't have been foreseen or prevented, and that
nothing we could have done could have changed the outcome. That doesn't
bring our babies back but perhaps I think that because it's a bit less
painful to think about having done something that caused it to happen. Guilt
is a very destructive force and I guess that we all go through that to some
extent or other, whatever the circumstances of our babies' deaths.

How are you feeling now, are you going to pursue some testing or try again?
--
Love and hugs

Janet
co-moderator, soc.support.pregnancy.loss

"AliasFan" wrote in message @l41g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
> Thanks for your reply. It is wonderful to hear from someone who has
> gone through the same thing, although I am very sorry that you went
> through it. That is an interesting thought about the progesterone. I
> didn't realize that the body produced the hormone in response to the
> pregnancy's viability. I think that just in case, however, I'll get my
> levels tested next time and take supplements if necessary. Part of me
> believes that both of my miscarriages were just nature's way of weeding
> out babies that would not have developed properly; however, another
> part fears that this will just keep happening every time. I'll find
> out I'm pregnant then begin spotting. I'll be like Sisyphus in Hades,
> almost reaching the top of the hill only to have the boulder roll down
> again. I've prayed that God will strengthen my faith and help me not
> think like that because I know those thoughts will only drag me down
> and not help the process. I want to be able to control circumstances
> with my thoughts: "I am going to have this baby; I won't have a
> miscarriage," but of course that doesn't work. To let go and let God
> isn't easy, but it's necessary. Thank you for your support, Janet.
>
> Janet Sackman wrote:
>> Hi there and welcome to the ng, I'm so glad that you found us.
>>
>> How desperately sad to read that you've lost 2 babies in such a short
> time.
>> That is just devastating. It happened to me back in 1993 and I'm just
> so
>> glad that that is behind me now, it was just awful to live through.
>>
>> It's great to be able to conceive quickly, I was able to as well and
> that is
>> a great blessing, but not if you then go on to lose the baby.
> Regarding the
>> progesterone issue, it's hard to say whether that was a cause or a
> symptom -
>> maybe progesterone levels are low because your body detected that the
> baby
>> wasn't viable, I think it's just very difficult to say. Statistics
> say that
>> the majority of miscarriages are caused by one-off chromosome
> problems but
>> then when you've just had 2 consecutive losses it's hard to buy into
> that,
>> isn't it? (unless that was just me who found it hard!! LOL!!)
>>
>> How are you dealing with all of this?
>> --
>> Love and hugs
>>
>> Janet
>> co-moderator, soc.support.pregnancy.loss
>>

AliasFan · Joined: 16 Aug 2007 Posts: 3

Yes, we will try again after a few months. We'll test my hormone
levels first thing, then move on to other testing if this happens
again. We're really hoping things will work out better next time. It
is amazing to me how many women have gone through this. I know some
women don't even realize they're pregnant when they miscarry, but even
among women who know they're pregnant the occurance of miscarriage is
epidemic. Just yesterday I talked with someone who had a miscarriage
before having her third child - in her case, she obviously had kids
before miscarrying. I've always wanted 2 or 3 kids, but at this point
I would rejoice over having just one healthy child.

Were you eventually able to have children? I sincerely hope so, and am
so sorry for your losses.

Janet Sackman · Joined: 15 Aug 2007 Posts: 120

Hi there, good to hear back from you. I hope that you are able to try to get
pregnant soon, and that it all works out beautifully for you next time.

I've got two living children; I had my son before the first two m/cs and
then had my daughter about a year after the second m/c; the third loss was 9
years later, it was hard to end my child-bearing time on a loss, but then
I'm so grateful that I managed to have two children successfully.

I hope and pray that it's not long before you have good news to share. In
the meantime keep in touch.

Love and hugs

Janet
co-moderator, soc.support.pregnancy.loss

"AliasFan" wrote in message @o13g2000cwo.googlegroups.com...
> Yes, we will try again after a few months. We'll test my hormone
> levels first thing, then move on to other testing if this happens
> again. We're really hoping things will work out better next time. It
> is amazing to me how many women have gone through this. I know some
> women don't even realize they're pregnant when they miscarry, but even
> among women who know they're pregnant the occurance of miscarriage is
> epidemic. Just yesterday I talked with someone who had a miscarriage
> before having her third child - in her case, she obviously had kids
> before miscarrying. I've always wanted 2 or 3 kids, but at this point
> I would rejoice over having just one healthy child.
>
> Were you eventually able to have children? I sincerely hope so, and am
> so sorry for your losses.
>
>